The ultimate guide of self-compassion
Self-compassion is showing love, understanding and concern, without judgement for someone who is suffering. Self-compassion has so many benefits one of the most prominent is the effect it has on mental health. Through self-compassion we can be more loving and compassionate towards other but most importantly towards ourselves.
There are three elements of self-compassion
2. Common humanity
Self-kindness is the act of being kind to yourself rather than criticising when things don't go as planned or when you make a mistake.
Common humanity being able to recognise that you are not alone. Experiencing pain, upset and personal inadequacy is part of the shared human experience.
Mindfulness is having a balanced awareness of negative emotions, neither ignoring nor exaggerating them. Observing your thoughts & feelings, trying to see the bigger picture without being judgemental of your experiences.
Self-compassion is not:
Self compassion is:
Having a kind understanding and an open mind
Caring awareness allowing us to listen to our bodies & find what is healthy for us
Self-compassion quiets down the ego without ignoring or suppressing the self's needs.
Benefits of self-compassion
Lowered symptoms of depression
How to put self-compassion into practice
Firstly, familiarise yourself with the following benefits of self-compassion.
You will recover quicker when you make mistakes
You will stop comparing yourself
You will not beat yourself up over the small stuff
You will take risks that scare you without fear of failure.
You will care less about what others think of you
Self-confidence will improve
Self-esteem will improve
As always, though, if you really want to see a difference, it takes active change and practice.
Speak kindly to yourself - Notice your self-talk! In times of failure or challenge noticing your self-talk can help you replace it with self-compassion. Instead of saying things like "I am such an idiot" you might say "I had a moment of absent-mindedness and that's okay".
Cultivate forgiveness towards self
A self-compassion technique you can start using immediately today is thinking "How would you treat a friend"?
As someone who used to be incredibly hard on myself, I can promise you, being more compassionate has changed my life. It didn't happen overnight and of course, things still bother me, and I become upset but I catch myself quicker than before.